The Beautiful Game

As I have mentioned before - I hate football!

Which is lucky seeing as it's the World Cup and the entire country if not World has gone completely stupid about what is, at the end of a day, a game! No one is inventing a cure for cancer, no one is ending world poverty or clearing the oil slick that is polluting the oceans as I type, no one is making sure that 6 year old girls don't get knifed in the chest. Instead, teams of 11 men are chasing a leather ball up and down a piece of grass trying to score goals. Put like that, it really doesn't seem that significant does it?

Now before you all lynch me for daring to hate the beautiful game let me assure you I do get the camaraderie of supporting your team and country. I do understand that the game crosses cultures and languages. When I was travelling, telling people that I was from near Liverpool instantly opened doors. "Ah Liverpool football, Stevie Gerard yes?". Yes I would agree wearily but it definitely opened lines of communication.

To try and overcome my prejudice (yes I'm honest enough to admit that maybe I am a little prejudice and negative when it comes to football and what it represents in today's culture) I actually watched the first England game last night. Admittedly we had all been to Marlow Regatta and had ended up back at a BBQ with the telly angled so it could be enjoyed from the garden otherwise I don't think I would have bothered at all.

And to be honest I don't know why I did! After the initial excitement of a goal after just 4 minutes the rest of the game descended into half-hearted action, a flurry of yellow cards and grown men rolling around the floor feigning injury. Even the hardened football fans in the group said it was very boring. I rest my case!

I just fail to see the appeal. And I certainly don't understand the prejudice that allows the football to be screened 24 hours a day, bosses to allow people time off and weddings to be cancelled, postponed or inconvenienced by a large football screen on the dance floor (if that's your attitude don't go. It's the height of bad manners to be invited to someones wedding knowing they have paid thousands and then disappear off to watch the football)- this just wouldn't happen for ice skating, rallying or even the Olympics.

And another thing - I really am on my high horse now! Thousands of years ago in Amphitheatres around the civilised world prostitutes were employed to stay inside the theatres after the game. This was so the men could take out their aggression, frustration, jubilation, victories etc on these poor women so they wouldn't then go home and do the same to their wives! I'd like to think times have moved on but unfortunately, domestic violence and assaults increases by 25-30% during World Cups. Testosterone has a lot to answer for...

I'm very lucky. The men in my life don't react in a violent way. Yes they enjoy the game. Yes they get involved. Yes some of them play sports themselves and I fully understand that adrenalin and testosterone are vital for sporting success. But if the men in my life can watch a game without resorting to violence, drunken loutish behaviour and generally making a nuisance of themselves why can't everyone else? And I'm not just tarring the men here, I have seen some truly appalling behaviour from girls during the World Cup too. We have to remember it is just a game and if our team doesn't win it really isn't a case of life and death...but I'm sure some people would disagree!