This Is Your Life!

I've been a teacher for 13 years now and I love it but it can really make you feel old at times.


It's just after New Year, my brother, girlfriend and some of their friends have decided to make an afternoon/evening of it in Liverpool. Following a nosh up and a couple of cheeky pints we have made our way to the Cavern Pub to watch the legendary and magnificent KAPPA band play. Now I could write a whole blog about this band alone, but that will keep for another time. They are like nothing you will ever see, hear or experience anywhere else and amazingly their gigs are generally free. If I could pass on one pearl of wisdom for life, it would be to get yourselves to the next KAPPA gig - enough said!

Anyway, back to the blog in question. We've had an amazing night and have made our way back to catch the train. I should point out, we have had a couple more cheeky pints and are feeling quite content with the world. At the station, my eye is caught by two young and gorgeous things who keep looking over and giggling. I said we were content with the world, not rolling drunk so I'm a little perplexed by their interest and laughter. Shrugging it off we get onto the train and settle in for the journey.

The two girls have sat down in the seats across the aisle. After a while, one of them leans forward and asks

"er, did you used to teach in R*&%$£" school?"

I look over at them and the years, glam clothes and make up fall away and I am staring into the eyes of two five your olds in my first class as a Newly Qualified Teacher!

"Oh my God, I used to teach you!" I gasp torn between horror at them being old enough to be out drinking and gratification that I made such an impact. Any teacher will tell you that you never forget your first ever class and it's true. I even have a framed photo of them on my wall. They were a wonderful class, great children, lovely parents, and a really happy time in my career. And I'm not just saying that because of the following response!

"yes, we loved you, you let us use those lovely gel pens to write with and you let us bring in our own music to play to the class. We had such good fun in your class. You were our best teacher at primary school"

I've got to be honest, I''m really quite touched and proud. Here are two mature, articulate girls who are both at college and making their way in life and it seems as if I may have contributed in some small way to their journey. And then my lovely brother who has had rather more cheeky beers than me leans over and says

"I bet she was a tyrant about the sand pit. Go on tell us, was she, was she?"

I give him my best Miss Sunshine is not amused glare which roughly translated means -you are in a whole heap of trouble when we get off the train! Luckily for me, my lovely ex-pupils defend me valiantly before leaving the train at their stop.

I feel ancient! I've reached the time in my life when I can join the ranks of old teachers who dread and fear the immortal words "Didn't you used to teach me?" All that's left now is to be wheeled onto 'This is Your Life'. Surely one of my ex-pupils will be famous enough for that...

A Life Less Ordinary

I've often thought that my life is just a series of random events held together by food and sleep. I'm the kind of girl who attracts the drunken nutters on the train, the kind of girl who geeky IT blokes seem determine to pursue while I'd rather meet Rob Pattinson, the kind of girl who gets a fit of giggles at the most inappropriate time, the kind of girl who gets asked for ID at the age of 30 and has to get her dad to vouch for her age - you get the picture.

I went on a date with a guy from Wigan once. I'm sure Wigan is lovely and to be fair so was the guy but his idea of funny and interesting life experiences was so far removed from mine it was painful. "This is a funny story" he'd start an anecdote with. And so I waited for 10 minutes... The tale failed to build in momentum and was so painfully unfunny that to this day, I can't recall any of the details. I like to think I'm a nice, kind, person so when he started his next anecdote with "This is a funny story", I gave him the benefit of the doubt. He's from Wigan, I thought, maybe funny is another way of saying strange there. 10 more minutes rolled by dragging a healthy clump of tumbleweed with it! All I can say is if that's what he calls funny and strange he wants to try living in my world for a while and he'd soon realise the difference. To help him gain some perspective, I told him of my time at Uni and how I had lived with some very 'interesting' people culminating in the lesbian nun who had left the Nunnery to become a teacher and a month later moved her girlfriend (who hadn't left the Nunnery and arrived in full Nun regalia) into our student house. We lived in a tiny village and were the talk of the town. Poor guy looked appalled and that was the end of that not so promising relationship!

I don't know why I should find life so full of amusement, random events and downright strange occurances but I think it's a combination of two things. The first being my ability to find the funny side to most situations and the second could well be the nature of my job.

I'm lucky enough to love my job! Don't get me wrong, if I won the Lottery, I'd pack my bags and set about finding a house with a big enough garage to hold all the classic, fast and beautiful cars that money could buy, but as I don't even purchase lottery tickets I'm not holding my breath. To return to the job, I'm a teacher. More specifically, I teach 4 and 5 year olds. This normally evokes two responses a) - oh how cute! or b) I don't know how you have the patience! My working day generally consists of a mix of the two!

People who work with small children will back me up on this. No two minutes are alike never mind two days. There is NO possibility of getting bored. You have to think on your feet, be prepared to laugh (mostly at yourself) and to be unfazed by anything the day throws at you. Strange, weird, funny, bizarre are all words that could describe most days. These tiny people keep you on your toes in a way that Red Bull can only dream of. Only today, I've been climbing ladders to hang space rockets from the ceiling, singing songs, discussing Tchaicovsky, dealing with arguments, fastening zips, writing menus and reading Charlie and Lola. The conversation is never dull either. I've been given a word for word run down on the Michael Jackson Thriller video (complete with dance moves that would make any Jacko fan proud), been told about a family holiday over half term (that for legal reasons I couldn't possibly disclose) and most thrilling of all, been told by one little darling "Miss Sunshine, I'm going to do a poo in the toilet". Lovely, you crack on!

A life less ordinary - no thanks, I like the one I've got!